This inflight uniform comes from Australian Airlines. I actually quite enjoy it. It's very jet-set. I am going to book a ticket with Australian just to say "Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?" when I am looking for this stew on my flight.
You search for a button to flush the toilet
You look for the "crew line" at the grocery store
You can pack for a 2 week trip to Europe in 1 roll-aboard
All of your pens have different hotel names on them
You NEVER unpack
You can recognize pilots by the backs of their heads-but not by their faces
You can tell from 70 yards away if a piece of luggage will fit in the overhead bin
You care about the local news in a city three states away
You can tie a neck scarf 36 ways
You know at least 25 uses for air sickness bags-none of which pertain to vomit
You understand and actually use the 24-hour clock
You own 2 sets of uniforms: fat and thin
You don't think in "months"-you think in "bid packs"
You always point with two fingers
You get a little too excited by certain types of ice
You stand at the front door and politely say "Buh-bye, thanks, have a nice day" when someone leaves your home
You can make a sentence using all of the following phrases: "At this time," "For your safety," "Feel free," and "As a reminder"
You know what's on the cover of the current issues of In Touch, Star, and People magazines
You stop and inspect every fire extinguisher you pass, just to make sure the "gauge is in the green"
Your thighs are covered in bruises from armrests and elbows
You wake up and have to look at the hotel stationery to figure out where you are
You refer to cities by their airport codes
You actually understand every item on this list
Everytime the door bell rings you look up at the ceiling
You change into you "galley shoes" to cook dinner at home
You open your bathroom doors at home slowly incase someone forgot to lock it
You only know 250 or 350 degrees on your home oven
When you ask your spouse when they will be coming home from work you ask for their "ETA"
You can spot out an airplane from the ground above and tell the other person what airline it is
You go through each room at your friends place looking for magazines to read
You bring home different grocery bags full of goodies that you can't get in your home town 34. You're a fire fighter, a nurse, a security officer and a server all in one
You have mastered the art of walking very quickly down the aisle and not catching anyone's eye
You call for the car doors to be armed and cross checked before pulling away
You try and put the foot brake on your shopping cart
When releasing your seatbelt in the car, you try to 'lift the top portion of the buckle and pull apart" and are confused when you can't find it
When sitting in the backseat of your friends car, you check the seat pocket for garbage
You remember the hotel phone numbers better than your home phone number
You see rubbish dropped on the floor in your own home and instead of bending down to pick it up, you kick it under the sofa
You have 400 mobile numbers in your adress book of crew you still wanted to meet up with, but can't put a face to their name
You locate all the exits when on public transport and learn the door operations
You are standing in an elevator in your hotel and cant remember your room number, let alone what floor you are on
You can never make definite plans, otherwise you know you'll be delayed/called in for sure
You can't help saying goodbye to friends or anyone without sounding patronising. "Buh-bye!"
You check your breast pocket for a pen when you are going to write a shopping list at home
Every time someone ask's a question your reply is ... 'Just bear with me," or "standby."
You feel the need to smile and greet people at all times, even when not working
You take out one blanket from the overhead bin or closet and hide it behind your back, walking quickly so no one sees it and you can use it
You know the water gague is showing empty and you grab a bottle of water and start washing your hands
You carry around ultra concentrated spray for protection against toxic lavatory odors
You have so much time off you have 2 jobs
You get so use to standing up while eating you don't even look for a chair anymore
You have mastered the art of putting on makeup in the car/bus/subway
You carry in your purse a stain-remover pen at all times
You apologize for everything
You appreciate time at home more than anyone else
When you ask someone a question, you stick your ear in their face and put your hand around it in order to hear better
When engaging in small talk you go on auto pilot
Even when you're not working you offer to place other passengers' luggage in the overhead bins and bring them blankets
You hear your cell phone ring even when it's not ringing
You bid flights according to the hotel at a destination, and not necessarily the destination itself
Nathaniel Daniel's Bucket List for 2008:
Maintain 3 digits in bank account for 3 CONSECUTIVE months -- I think I did this! Oh...3 months? I thought it said hours.
Run half marathon -- Well this one's just silly.
Commit to something besides a lease for 6 months (job, man, gym membership, etc.) -- Job? Check! Man? Do they have to be 6 consecutive months? Gym? FAIL.
Eat at 1 new restaurant every month -- Who the hell has the cash flow for this? Actually, if hotel restaurants/room service count, I definitely win.
Learn to cook a new dish every month -- I am going to assume that watching Rachael Ray counts. Check.
Gain 10 lbs of non fat -- This is gonna have to be a life long goal.
Learn Spanish (when in little Puerto Rico, do as the Puerto Ricans do…) -- I am still waiting for you to buy me the damn Rosetta Stone!
Two words: six pack. -- Yep had many of those.
Move into bedroom in where I do not feel the need to tell people "that's just my walk-in closet." -- Well lets see...I moved into an even tinier bedroom that I had to share with another, and then I moved into a very spacious room....at my parent's house. I am going to put a big fat X on this one.
Repeated visits to So.Flo 
Travel out of state with unused plane ticket -- This must be before I started working for the blue jet. Voided!
Get no more parking tickets (those green paper bastards) -- Ack! I got 3. But I only paid 2, so that should count for something.
Pay all my bills in a prompt manner -- Yessss thank you Suze O.
Go on 8 dates that are not dinner and a movie (…snooze) -- Another life long goal.
Learn how to cook a decent batch of rice -- F rice, I hate you!
Be 100% honest, even when it hurts -- I only lie when it makes myself look better.
Get a dog! -- No, but I had enough friends to get dogs to turn me off to the idea.
Volunteer at a soup kitchen (it's sooo in right now) -- I googled it when I was bored one time.
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